Reciprocity

 November 24, 2022

All I’ve ever wanted, for as long as I can remember, is to love someone with my entire soul, and have them love me too. Reciprocity. It’s been an endless search, and my heart leads me to cold places where I pour my heart out into a cold metal strainer. The emotions always seems to coincide with the exciting and passionate, and I tend to have little interest in the boring more stable relationships- the ones where the other person is actually offering love. I have taught myself wrong, backwards. And in turn have turned into an emotionally deprived soul that loves to wound itself. 




“The standard which you insist on placing on others is simply not attainable. You, yourself cannot do it. So you expect perfection out of others that you cannot even achieve yourself.” - words from my mother when i was 11. And I wonder why relationships have been difficult for me :))

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